individualism

recently i have read and seen a cry for individualism in people my age. they go on to talk about how everyone is an individual with different thoughts and different personalities. the issue of doing what one thinks is right, doing what one thinks represents oneself, doing what one thinks is called 'being an individual'. but have they ever wondered whether by just doing all those things they are actually victims of the herd mentality? in actual fact none of us can categorize ourself as being a total individual. none of us can even have the right to say that. whatever thought, speech, gesture of ours have already been pre-governed, pre-set by our perception of the norm. none of us want to be alienated. all of us have an embedded fear of being an outcast. subconsciously no matter how loud, no matter how adament we try to prove that we are an individual...we are not. the very fact that we tend to speak the way we do shows our wanting to fit in...the very fact that we even bother to get a certain 'hairstyle' or a piece of clothing just goes to show that we have already fallen into the grasps of society's norms. society's norms...hence proving further that we all are victims of the herd mentality. none of us can deny that nor escape from it. so bullshit to those who claims to be an individual. just by bellowing thoughts and theories of invidualism does not make one an individual. INDIVIDUALISM IS NOT JUST ALL TALK! to be is to be it, to live it, to breathe it, to die by it. by writing this entry i am not trying to prove that i am an individual but i am just highlighting the narrowness in our way of thinking. we have to look at the bigger picture before stating any claims. ok enough said...so till the next update...the bigger picture moves the world of mankind.

ramblings

it's been awhile..so tought of updating! lazy lazy lazy. the four letter word which also should be omitted from my vocabulary. i've been relaxing and slacking like mad since the start of term. i guess it must be the thought of going home soon and that this whole year will be coming to an end soon. another new life waiting ahead. one filled with new adventures and new experiences. but yet no matter how attractive and fresh these new 'discoveries' may be, i don't want to leave all the people i have met here. bet a few eyes will be teary after the first of december. omg i didn't know valedictory is going to be such a formal event! i mean there's even a dress code and all! ok...i guess i sound kind of 'ulu' now. oh oh i can't wait for the prom! just can't wait to get all dressy and all. ok now sounding so bimbo! getting into my drama role...the bimbo mum of the century! i think i'l be laughing at myself on stage. nvm..a role different from other roles i have played. venturing into the unknown...into the undiscovered me. haha..ok enough drama. ok i have nothing else worth saying...i have been rambling nonsense anyway...so before the next update....great spirits are always violently opposed by mediocre minds.

jonathan rhys meyers

JONATHAN RHYS MEYERS IS HOT!! his eyes are just so intense looking. he has this brooding look that can just make me melt! he is why i love irish guys. hot, hot, hot! loved him bend it like beckham and completely adored him in vanity fair. words just cannot describe how hot and sexy his eyes are!! haha...ok i sound like a small teenage girl going goo goo gaa gaa over a boy band. haih...never will i ever meet a guy with that kind of gaze and look. wait...should i believe in hope? if i do then woohoo! light does shine in my life. haha..

had a fun day yesterday at st kilda..well maybe it wasn't filled with activity and all that but we did do a lot of walking and photo taking. oh my goodness..we are all officially e.g's to the max!! haha...erm it's an inside joke but krystle would know what it means. i mean we did the charlie's angels pose right in the middle of a pathway which was filled with people..not a deserted one but a busy one! how thick skinned are we man?! haha..but it was fun all the same. and of course photo taking would not be complete without the 'self potraits' initiated by ahma! her ever famous photo taking style. :) did manage to get some sun rays on my skin but not enough to give back my skin the healthy brown glow. damn it. when i get back to m'sia to the pool i go. never knew that the warmth and sun can be so inviting! now i understand the europeans hunger for the sun. i never did until now. oh ya we went to get imran's suit for the prom too. not bad la. can do for the night. the prize for the rent was reasonable too. the gowns on sale at that shop was fabulous! they were gorgeous! wouldn't mind renting one actually...that is if i had a date! nvm going as a singleton isn't that bad. it's the company that matters but i don't think i'll be having any problems with that. good friends equals good company.

i can't wait to go back home. can't wait to be able to sleep in my own room for at least more than the pathetic two weeks but have to be back by mid feb. that's just so awful! that's so little time to spend with family and friends. haih...getting a paper qualification comes first i guess. life can be so hectic at times. i do feel like stopping and giving it all up sometimes but then the world still continues to spin on its axis and other people still go about doing their thing. so i have no choice but pick myself up again and continue the rat race. actually i don't even think there is a possibility of ever stopping to rest. one responsilibity just leads on to another. nothing ever ends. i guess that's why the phrase 'circle of life' is used. a inevitable cycle we all have to undertake. i think that's why peserverence and determination are such vital qualities to survive in the world today. without them we would just crumble and fall.

ok i think that's enough rambling for the day. till the next update.....jonathan ryhs meyers is hot! hehe :)

immortality

after almost a week of silence i have decided to break it. holidays have just come and gone. not looking forward to going back to the studying and maths stress! this is what i don't like about school/college/uni life. once a big exam burden has been lifted u are bogged down by another! the stress of being a student. one thing to look forward to this term...graduation! can't wait to finally close another chapter to my schooling life. but i will definately miss the people i have become so close to. anyway...the future is something i am looking forward to. there's somethings u just want to leave behind and start anew.

nothing interesting to post. my mind is just an array of thoughts...nothing really substantial and necessary to be put down in writing. actually this blog is kind of a hisorical site don't u think? i mean everything i have been through, felt, thought, done in the past are all written and recorded here. it's like something people would do in the past when history needed recording. jotting down thoughts an happenings of oneself to form an immortal u. hmm...so long as men can breathe or eyes can see, so long lives this, and this gives life to thee....in this case this gives life to me! isn't it so true. immortally gained within the pages of a book, within the posts of a blog! haha... it does give a sense of comfort doesn't it? i guess everyone wants to be remembered after death. not having a single memory of oneself in the minds of others after death can be extremely frightening. it's as if u never even existed on the face of the earth! being invisible and visible at the same time...chilling thought... actually it's not chilling but rather it's a case of loneliness and rejection...or it could be a case of loneliness and falseness. not everyone is the true friend they crack up to be. even i myself must admit my folly. i have put on a facade in front of certain people...acting, hiding behind the mask of smiles and amiability.

ok i think that's enough for one post. till the next update....noone is true to u except urself.